This year the verse that stuck out to me as the verse that would be my focus of the year was 1 Timothy 4:14 “Do not neglect the gift that is in you, which was given to you by prophecy with the laying on of the hands of the eldership.” This verse has been bouncing around my mind for several months now and it seems as though there should be a clear direction by this point in the year. However, there has been no clear direction as to what I am supposed to do.
The question that arises is what gift am I neglecting? Where am I not walking in all that I am called to do? From the outside it would seem like I am doing all the things, I serve in my church, I work in the field that I went to school for. However, there is this growing discontent, a feeling as though there is something else or something more that I should be different. I feel a little like Elsa in the Into the Unknown song.
Or are you someone out thereInto The Unknown
Who’s a little bit like me?
Who knows deep down
I’m not where I’m meant to be?
I currently serve in my church in tech. Those who know me, know that tech is my favorite hiding place in church. Serving in tech is easy for me, its a place where I go when I don’t know what to do, or need a season of rest. Its a place where I feel safe and grounded. Somedays I feel my heart stirring, something in me starts to bubble and then life gets busy and those things find themselves back on the back burner where they were before. I started writing this blog post a month ago, and then life got in the way and here it is 30 days later and I am trying to finish it.
I feel as though there are gifts I am neglecting but I can’t seem to put my finger on what gifts they may be and what I am supposed to do with the knowledge. So for today I am just putting it out there, that this is something I am continuing to pray about and think about.